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E is for envy.

We’ve all felt that nasty emotion: envy.

In the new Goosebumps movie, R.L. Stine (played by Jack Black) has a meltdown.

“Stop trying to be Stephen King, man.”

“Let me tell you something about Steve King. Steve King wishes that he could write like me! I’ve sold more books than him, but no-one ever talks about that! WAY more books!”

crazy pants 2

Columbia Pictures and Sony Pictures Animation’s Goosebumps.


And he’s not the only writer who feels that way.

Though I probably shouldn’t be blogging about this…

Oh, what the hell.

Remember when you wrote that excellent romance about vampires only to be told it wouldn’t sell? Yeah… Or when you wrote your own modern version of Lady Chatterley’s Lover and they told you there was no market for it…?

As JS Malpas (Useless Book Club, Gambling Tip for Writers) blogged:

“You’re playing blind. It’s like sitting down at a card table with a pair of kings and not knowing whether the dealer is playing poker or blackjack. If their list has nothing in your genre, you’re back to the 1% chance of success. If they already filled their quota for flintlock fantasy, you start at 0% and stay there.”

In other words: publishing is like playing roulette. Some you win, some you lose.

Still, getting rid of that nasty bugger is difficult.

But like I tell my fur-children when they want to bite each other to get my attention: each Rottie will get his turn.

So be patient. Polish your novel (during Camp NaNoWriMo <grin>). And be on your best behaviour – acting like a hyena will only get you into trouble. Write your awesome novel because one of these days Lady Luck will smile in your favour.

“It’s every man’s obligation to put back into the world at least the equivalent of what he takes out of it.” – Albert Einstein

Fellow scriveners: any stories about getting rid of envy you’d like to share? Every dog gets its day – have you?

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